Today I took a walk

It was glorious to be outside.

The sidewalk was a familiar friend. We have traveled together on many occasions but today was different. We took some time to get reacquainted. Instead of hurrying, as I have done in the past, we we walked slowly together. She whispered secrets from the months of our separation. She told me of the house that has been bought and will be torn down and rebuilt. She told me of the changing of seasons as we passed the green grass, the flowers, and the children's bicycles abandoned on driveways next to sidewalk art. She promised to show my little boy all of the wonders of our neighborhood soon. But, for now, we simply walked together...content in our shared journey back to my front porch.

happy birthday Americal

The bed rest chronicles continue.

As part of our celebration of America, earlier today I took a nap. I did not intend to take a nap but I was overcome with sleepiness while reading.

When I woke up several hours later, I was very hungry for a hamburger (minus the ham), french fries and a chocolate shake. I tried to think about the cabbage salad in the fridge but it did not work. I knew what I wanted.

The great thing about being 823.5 weeks pregnant and spending 1/3rd of that time in bed is that your husband is willing to give you anything you want. So, I mention that I am craving the most unhealthy meal in the world and he says no problem. Where do you want to go? (He's a peach!)

We went to the Shake Shack. They can accomodate my being vegetarian and Josh's being gluten free AND, most importantly, they have chocolate shakes. We've never eaten there but I felt confident in the choice for the chocolate shake since its pretty much in their name.

I intended to take pictures of my delicious food to share but by the time we got there, ordered and they brought our food to us, my stomach was pretty much eating itself from the inside out. I was 2/3 of the way through the meal when I thought to take a picture. I thought about it for 1.2987325 seconds before I took another bite of food and moved on. I will just have to trust that you have seen burgers, fries, and chocolate shakes before in your life. If not, please crawl out from under the rock where you have been living and go experience real life.

Happy Birthday America!

Love,
Amy

a thought or two at the end of a pregnancy

The bed rest looms and seems to stretch into infinity. It truly is a strange feeling because the bed rest seems endless. The pregnancy seems endless even as I am acutely aware the end is approaching. I can feel my body gearing up for the birth of my sweet boy. My back has begun to ache. My right leg feels as if it has been dislodged from its socket. My pelvis...well lets just say if one considered doing the splits over a crate of dynamite this 4th of July, I advise against it. Strangely...or perhaps not so strangely, there is a twinge of sorrow that accompanies this new, approaching reality. Even considering the months and months and months of endless nausea and vomiting. Even considering the weeks and weeks of bed rest as I laid as still as possible praying this little boy would not be born, praying our little boy would have his best chance at life, there is something of a sadness in the coming change. Up until now, he has been mine...all mine. I have been the one who has cared for him, my body has been the one that has fed him and cradled him and sheltered him. He hears my voice echoing in his ears and my hands rubbing against his sweet little body. For months and months and months, this little boy has been mine and when he is born, I have to share him with the world.

That is not to say that I will not be glad to share him. That is not to say that I will not be glad to hold him close and touch him and watch his daddy hold him close.

It is only to say, things are changing. It is only to say, I love you baby boy and I will see you on the other side.